Sunday, June 29, 2008

And They Lived Happily Ever After


That's the plan, but after a career in planning I know the results often bear only a minor resemblance
to the original vision. I enter this phase of life with my eyes wide open, except during my afternoon nap.


The first six weeks of retirement have been fantastic! I've always embraced the art of relaxation, but I seem to have taken chillin' to a previously unexplored level. There are just never enough hours in the day to accomplish, well…nothing.
A typical day starts early; sleeping late would only degrade my midday snooze.
I read all of my e-mail every day. It's incredible how many people want to date me, hire me, give me money.
Then, armed with my IPOD, newly programmed with over 280 classic tunes, I walk, hand dance, head bop, and occasionally lip sync my way to the local convenience store to buy the NY Daily News.
I return home for a healthy breakfast, usually Cheerios and strawberries. (Fascinating, right?)
A few daily chores completed, (grocery shopping is my favorite; I dread filling the soap dispenser) and I'm prepared to face whatever glorious prospects the day provides.
I'm on a merry-go-round that takes me from deck to pool to bed to barbecue; round and round she goes. Books, DVD's, and TV serve as entertaining diversions. (Who knew "Saved By the Bell" was such a classic?)
Life is good, and I haven't even mentioned my grandsons yet!
Two boys, two joys. They deserve, and will receive, a separate blog entry devoted to their contributions to my life as a retired gentleman.
And so it goes.
I fully expect the best is yet to come; snowbirding is going to be so cool! Yet, I know, inevitably, the worst is yet to come as well. (I already sometimes drool when I sleep. Too much information?)
So, it was with that thought in mind that I started preparing for early retirement years ago. My bride and I are hedging our bets by purchasing 7 years of prime time life. For some, the price may seem exorbitant, when you consider lost wages, reduced pensions, higher medical insurance costs. But 7 years? Priceless……….
Finally, some words of advice to any young people (less than 40 years old) who aspire to an early retirement: Marry a saint, someone who will share your dreams and not spend all of your money along the way.
If you can't find a saint, marry a school teacher. They have great pension plans.
As most of you know, I, of course, married both. (Lucky man.)
And they lived happily ever after………………